Haircuts

~~A Critique On Human Behavior~~

There is something peculiar I have come to notice in the past few months.  It is quite simple, but it represents a much larger tendency amongst people.  What, you ask?  Haircuts.  It seems that I am the only person that I notice complimenting people on getting their hair cut anymore.  It may seem small and insignificant, but let me explain.  People, men and women, get their hair cut to feel better about themselves, increase their self esteem, try to increase their attractiveness, put to rest an old phase, signify the start of a new phase, all types of reasons beyond the obvious "it was hanging in my eyes".  It isn't always easy to spot, especially if someone with 18 inch long hair gets 1/2 inch taken off.  But, more times than not, it is obvious.  Yet, I very rarely hear others saying anything to the owner of a new style.  I ALWAYS say something, unless, of course, it was a horribly done job that they are trying desperately to hide until it grows out.  But I always say "I see you got your hair cut, Scott/Jenny/whoever".  Always.  And, I always get a thank you, more times than not a surprised "thank you". 

Why?  Is it that difficult to say something kind that will take a grand total of ten seconds?  If you notice, why don't you compliment?  It just seems that people are so often preoccupied with their own lives, that they don't do something so simple as to give a person a simple compliment anymore.  Worse yet, they remember the one slight that they imagine you have done to them, forgetting the 100 things you have went out of your way, often times interrupting the flow of your own life, to do for them.  Words unsaid can sting just as badly as words said.  Often times...more. 

Thank you is not difficult.  People notice when you don't show gratitude.  Not that you are supposed to blather all over someone every time they throw you a nickel (and, unfortunately there are people that will do things for you, specifically to cash in on those strings that are attached).  But showing a little gratitude to someone who has went out of their way to do something for you is never a bad thing.  Thank you.  Or a nice note.  Anything.  But it seems that it's just too damn hard to do.  Or, it might be embarrassing.  Or, somebody else is doing/did more for you.  Or, who the hell knows.  But when ingratitude becomes the norm, expect people to start dropping out of your life.  Certain people will always be there to do things for you... for a price.  Usually you don't realize the price you are going to inevitably pay until it is too late.  But, believe me, you WILL pay that price.  But for that person standing back in the corner, who always complimented your haircut, always was there for you, and always gave what they could- they might not be there anymore.  Because when it gets to the point where you start feeling used, or worse yet put down, these people will disappear.  And, really, who can blame them?  Who wants to give, even if it is out of barely nothing, yet still give, and receive a virtual slap in the face for doing so?  Giving out of poverty means way more than giving out of wealth, with strings tied.  Usually it only takes once for the receiver to learn this lesson.  Unfortunately, not always. 

Nobody is perfect, everybody makes mistakes, everybody gets preoccupied with completely unimportant crap from time to time.  But when the day is done, what have you done for others vs. what you have done for yourself?  Have you done ANYTHING nice (with no strings attached) for anybody today?  Are your loyalties in the right place, or are they severely misplaced?  Do you make your own decisions, or do you let others' whims and attitudes make your decisions for you?  The hardest person in the world to face is always yourself.  Go stare at yourself in the mirror for 10 minutes and tell yourself who YOU are.  Stumped?  Did you start out with "my name is x and I am a -occupation-".  Hint- YOU are not your occupation.  Unless of course you are an artist or a writer.  Then you most likely really do put YOU into your work.  But "My name is Bob and I am a Chemical Engineer"?   I feel sorry for you Bob.  You have no idea who you are or what life is all about.  And I am guessing that Bob doesn't notice when Jane gets a haircut. 

Next time you notice someone got a haircut, tell them they look nice.  Remember the people who have been there for you through thick or thin, even if you do think of them as losers or less than you.  They took out of THEIR life to add to YOUR life.  And don't shit on people.  It is very unappealing, and I guarantee that WHATEVER it is that happens, those people won't be around to let it happen a second time.  You have one shot at life.  You can either live it mad and reassessing all the wrongs you think have been done to you by her and him and them.  You will most likely die alone and grouchy.  Or you can lighten up, spread some happiness, and reap the benefits.